Without Mother

Without Mother

When I come home,

nobody will fuss anymore over 

my meals, nobody will call me

early morning, "wake up, Rama

will sweep your room",

Nobody will scold me over going out in the hot sun, 

nobody will call me ten times,

to hurry back home, i am getting late

for my Sunday sojourn to work place.

For whom will I buy fruits,toiletries

and small little things Oh Maa,

For whom will I run back home

without caring for friends and enjoyment, with whom I will sit 

with a tea cup in hand,listening to

a thousand times repeated stories,

For whom i will practise

listening about people i have not known nor recognise, to whom I will tell to talk positive,

and instruct how to operate

a smart phone, 

In whose blissful shadow I will fall asleep with bliss in my heart, Maa,

for whom I will buy sarees and 

and stray medicines, 
for whom my life will 

seem to have found a reason to 
march on,alone,and unabashed.

Whom I will scold, 

for being suicidal, for whose rights I will fight with a much occupied father and the world,

for whom my heart will jump for joy,
when joy came visiting,
whose unseen presence will

keep the bounce in my feet, 

and spring in my steps?

You were,

that I got up and faced 

the morning and the day's hot sun,

You were, that I stood in the rain 

and braved the storms,

life's intermittent betrayals and the silent breaking of my heart, your love gave me
love to bear

the pain hurled from

the oddly entered pathways, your presence breezed the corners

of my heart, 

at the low and the high crossroads I stood stupefied,  at times
gazing at the grey horizon.

Tell me how will I climb the steps again

and how will I get into the bus of life to tell I did got a seat Maa, 

I am safe, 

I do not know your address anymore, your chair is empty,as is empty your bed, my eyes 

look for signs 

but see nothing, 
now and again something gathers in my chest when I think of a world without you

my stomach revolts and clouds

gather under the eyes, 

I long for you, heart cries for you,
Oh Maa, as tears wet the face and the psyche.

Nothing feels good without you anymore,

It is a dull sky overhead

and a long joyless path that awaits,

which leads nowhere.