At the river

Standing at the bank,
You marvel at the rippling greenish flow,
the vast expanse of a river,
Under the slowly dying sun

You keep watching the sunset
and the dark waters shining under the quietly
mounting moon,
content and peaceful.
beautiful and small
as you read from the pages
of the night.

Suddenly someone comes
and holds your hand,
you shrink and struggle,
trying to free yourself,
But the insisting hand
and the twinkling eyes
lead you into the water step by step.

Your timid self, that was
always afraid of the depth,
of sinking,suffocating and drowning,
suddenly comes alive,
the water cold to your feet,
you want to be there for eternity,
want more depth,
even when life blows past you,
Wading in the water
just like that ,
holding the hand,
It's warmth,seeping into your blood.

Now that you have started knowing the pleasures
of water, of the depth,
you yearn for more.

Suddenly the hand that holds yous loosens
its grip
and moves away,
to hold another hand,fairer and younger
to seek something fresher,newer.

Time stops for you.
Neither you move farther,
nor you want to go back,
after you have known and understood the river
and its dark secrets.
Time stands in its place, still,
like a dis-functional unmoving pendulum

You just stand there,
puzzled, stupefied,and waiting,
not knowing what happened and why.

Only a vast hunger opens its mouth
and looks for
an outlet,a desire to devour
something incomprehensible.

You want to call out, scream,
and to cry,
but tears flow inward,
and dark shadows move farther and farther,
living only
a deathlike silence,
which only you can hear.