If There is Heaven...

It's mid afternoon
And a breeze scatters the leaves,
You can almost hear a call if you have a ear for it,
to come and lose yourself somewhere
in the mangroves or the clusters of trees
at the foot of the hill.
Nowhere the twilight sings so beautifully,
Nowhere the trees invite you so maddening,
Nowhere you melt into tears
just for nothing,
Nowhere you can meditate
and connect with the universe so close,
even on a bike,
Nowhere else can you close your eyes
in the middle of a crowd
and trust so perfectly

and can choose to get lost completely.

Balancing Love and Logic- From The Speaking Tree column published in THE TIMES OF INDIA

IT IS SOMETHING NOT WRITTEN BY ME. I READ IT IN THE TIMES OF INDIA AND LIKED IT.

Can we achieve a balance between love and logic? Logic leads to material gains, while love warms the heart and leads to emotional and spiritual gain. In life, both are required. The eternal battle between mind and heart is something all of us have to contend with. You are made up of body, mind, heart and soul. Physically, the heart is a separate organ and the mind has no physical location. But when we speak of heart in poetic or metaphysical terms, when we speak of emotions, ‘heart’ refers to the part of the brain which is responsible for our emotions. And love is always of the heart, never of the mind.

The human mind is a double edged sword. It can take us to great heights, as we can see from scientific and technical advances we’ve accomplished. It can also push us into the depths of decline, and all the crimes, wars and bloodshed over centuries are proof of that. The heart is responsible for feelings of love, compassion, sharing, altruism, sympathy, and empathy, but is a bad businessman. The heart is much ‘weaker’ than the cognitive and rational thinking part of the brain. The heart is not concerned with profit and loss, or with assets and liabilities. In fact, if anything, the heart is irrational and illogical.

Love always springs in the heart. It is a deep connection between two human beings, which cannot be explained or understood with words. And love can happen to anyone, anytime. Every society places a lot of rules and restrictions on love, romance and marriage. Although our mind understands these and tries to follow them, the heart can often break through the barriers and fall in love, even if it means going against social conditionings and beliefs. The heart can bring you true love, but you might have to pay a price.

Another problem with love is that we often tend to confuse our thoughts for feelings. Love cannot be described or taught to anyone. It arises spontaneously. How does one know whether what one feels, is really love, or something masquerading as love? Love implies freedom both to you and the one you love; love implies that you are willing to do anything for the happiness of the other person, even if it is not in your interest. Love is unconditional, without any ifs and buts. If one wants to know true love, one must observe, study and understand the love of a mother for her child. This is often considered the gold standard, where love is concerned.

If you truly love someone, you will only want to give, not to take. Possessiveness and jealousy are not part of true love; they are thoughts of the mind, which is always from worrying about losing your love. True love is never scared of losing anything, because it does not want to take, only give. And when you are only interested in giving, how can you be worried about losing anything?

The mind often tries to tell us many things---the person you love is not rich, is not good looking, is not educated enough, will not be acceptable to your parents …. But if you truly love someone, it will be easy to counter all these arguments. The mind warns us against losses when we are in love, but true love does not care whether you gain or lose. The moment you start asking “What’s in it for me, it is no longer love. Real love is always unconditional, without ego, and ready for every sacrifice.

Follow P V Vaidyanathan at speakingtree.in

CLASS TEACHERS, FALLING LEAVES AND VALENTINE'S DAY

We were revising concepts and I was flipping through the note-book. I was loooking at concept explanations and correction in red pen and couldn't even remember when I had done it. Suddenly it dawned to me that I will not do so in his notebook anymore. All these red marks will become a distant memory for him and me. But they are there today.Suddenly I felt choked with emotion that this bond was going to end and I will not see his innocent face anymore.

Today was my last day with my children. My children because I have been their class teacher for the last ten months. Sthiti told again today that she will miss me very much. 'Ma'am, I am feeling very sad.' she told. She always talks a lot and I don't give a lot of importance to her. But after they submitted their art papers and stated going to the field, Sahil told that it was my last day with her and even a hardy like Sohel came and asked for blessings. Following him, my bravest girl Smriti came and snuggled up to me and told that she would miss me badly. Other girls and boys followed. It was then that I couldn't control my tears. It was may be because nobody missed me or made me feel special that way ever. I told them that they will get into a new class and will gradually gorget the old memories. New happiness will enter their life in the new class.

The life of a class teacher is like that. In the beginning of the session, we struggle to remember the names of all the children in a class. But by the end of a session, we become a family. A family with a class teacher and her children. Just three days ago, In was asking children why teachers don't want to do substitution in their class...why they have grown so naughty and unruly. But I felt so happy and comfortable with them. They were my responsibility. Sahil told Ma'am we are yours and you are ours. I was almost in tears at that moment. It's beautiful bond that is ever forged between a teacher and children because of a single responsibility. And there is no possesssion. Just a relationship based on mutual love and trust. Despit the full knowledge of the fact that these children will forget everything next year. Their innocense will go. They will grow and the world will take them in their grip. They would start following others. I felt a bit sad today thinking that I will never find them again with this innocense, this originality and beauty. These life will be lost forever. Bt at the same time, I am happy that with full knowledge of this ephemeral world, I have tried my best to be fair and just to them, have shared their problems and have loved and disciplined them without wanting anything in return except some love and a little respect.

 Today the day remained sad. I mean the sky. The sun showed only half of its face. This kind of weather is    simply heavenly.In my home town, the trees are shedding leaves. When you walk under them, dead leaves fall in light showers all over you. And under a sorrowful sky, walking the streets is another experence. You get transformed under the canopy of foliages overhead in a city surrounded by hills. Falling leaves tell that if there is life, there is death too. If there is death, there is regeneration and rebirth. The world is witness to this continuous process. We live only one life, but life goes on. I fall into reverie looking at the falling leaves, that one day this world will be and I will not be anymore. All the experiences, of pleasure and pain, will be lost in the eternity.

Tomorrow's valentine's day. Today our youngest teacher came in a beautifully bright saree and a nose ring, hands full of bangles and eyes lined with kohl. She had just got married to her girlhood sweetheart. Looking at her, Valentine's day, seems to have some meaning. Some creatures like me never got the luck to expect love, but on such occassions, there is nobody to buy a present for or feel close to. But there are so many couples who are with one another and are perfectly happy. This day is for them. And people like me can make the day special for those old couples who have no love in their life. Something to remind them that they ought to express love for the people who spend life with them.

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO ALL SUCH PEOPLE WHO ARE IN LOVE AND ALL SUCH WHO HAVE FORGGOTTEN A WORD CALLED LOVE.